the question of the day

hi all,

i'm switching it up today - instead of a story i'm giving you a question to ponder:

"i don't want a relationship"

just chatting with one of my girls who has been given this speech more times than she can count. and i know my toronto ladies must wish they had a dollar for every time they heard that. 

but what does it really mean?

if you live with a man, wash his dirty drawers, cook his food, meet his mother, and know his online banking password, can you say you're not in a relationship?

what about if you talk to him every day, think of him as soon as you wake up and last thing before you go to bed, sleep hugged up with him - satin scarf and all - and get up and make him breakfast day after day? are you really not in a relationship?

is "i don't want a relationship" just a euphemism for "i don't want monogamy"?
"i don't want drama"?

"i don't want to have to be considerate of you if it's inconvenient for me"?

i know i have told men in the past that i don't want a relationship. but was that what i really meant? i know what i don't want  - i don't want shared addresses, co-parenting of pets, other-girl-drama, and fighting that you have to endure because it's less complicated than ending it and most of all i don't want to get punched in the face - neither literally nor figuratively...but i don't like sharing and i want to know that he'll still be there tomorrow. so does that mean i want a relationship? 

and really when you think about it, isn't everything a relationship?

drop your thoughts in the comment box.

(don't worry - i'll be back soon with more misadventures)